Thursday, May 1, 2008

The Gods Are Conspiring Against Me...

I'm so tired right now - Hooow Tiiiiired Are Yoooouuuu? - I'm so tired, I cant even be bothered to play Tetris on my new phone.

And it's really not a good time to be exhausted - tomorrow, I'm headed down to New Orleans for a bachelor party weekend (not mine).

As it is, the guys I'm going with are much bigger drinkers than I am. In fact, I can definitely see this scene playing out at around 11:30 PM on Saturday night at Razzoo's....

HARRIS walks up to BARTENDER.

Harris - I'll have seven Hurricanes and....

Harris leans in towards the bartender. Confused, the bartender leans in too...

Harris - (whispering)...and a diet coke.

Rock On,

Aitch

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love how you clarify its not yours.

Harris said...

hey anonymous,

i must...rumours have been swirling.

rock on,

aitch

Anonymous said...

You are proposing on Cinco De Mayo aren't you!!!!

Harris said...

hey anonymous,

proposing? hey! slow down there cowboy (or cowgirl)!

...but i could put a ring in one of my famous Cinco de Mayo MacaBlooms!

What? MacaBlooms aren't just for Passover anymore....

rock on,

aitch

acw said...

Ask for a virgin Rum and Coke. It confuses them better.

Anonymous said...

YES...do that...and you can ask her to be your MacaBride via MacaBlooms!

Josh Homer said...

who is this anonymous and why do they want you and Josie to get married so bad?

Harris,
When are you going to make some MacaBlooms? I've been toying around with a comedy show idea called "Cake and Comedy" where people get a free desert (prepared by the comics) with their ticket. I make an award winning carrot cake.

Josh

Harris said...

hey anonymouscoworker,

can i make it a virgin rum and diet coke? wow..THAT'LL impress 'em!

hey anonymous,

yer josie's mom, aren't you? (or my mom)

hey josh homer,

funny you say that - Doug and I were gonna run a show and call it "Cookies! with a side of comedy" - and us make cookies every week.

i'll save you some next time i whip up a batch

rock on,

aitch

Anonymous said...

Hey Josh Homer,

Why DONT you want them to get married. Hmmmmm.

Mom

Anonymous said...

I dont want them to get married so bad, I just like to see people make the most out of Cinco de Mayo.

Josh Homer said...

Mom,
It's not that I don't want them to get married, I was just questioning your reasons for wanting it so bad, which you cleared up by saying you were the mom. I just want Harris and Josie to be happy, if that's married so be it. If that's going to bringer shows and remembrance of victims of violent crime meetings, then that's cool too. I'm a libra.


Harris,
How can I get in on this comedy and food idea? It's combining two of my favorite things.
Josh

Doug Adler said...

First of all, is common knowledge that Bloom can't drink. After 2 beers he begins giggling incessantly like a brain damaged ventriloguist.

How about "Comedy and some Matzoh"? That way, no audience members will be going to the bathroom during our sets. In fact, they won't be going for weeks.

Anonymous said...

aitch, doug, and josh:

i will attend any and all comedy events where food is involved.

1) i consider guinness to be a food
2) yes, even in queens